The word I hate the most...

... is absolutely goodbye. The problem is that you think you have time. But it goes. Too fast, way too fast. I regret only that I thought that I've time. I know that it's time for me to go home, but there are still so many people out there I would want to know better, so many places to see, so many opportunities..
During your life people comes and goes. They change you, some more some less. There are the people who change you only a little even though you spend all year with them. Then there are those who you see only couple of times and they change you a lot. Maybe only with a smile, or couple of jokes. Those who you would want to know better.
There are different kinds of people. With some you get along better than with others. There are also different kinds of goodbyes. There are these ones which are only temporary. And those ones that are maybe the last ones. Last couple of weeks have been full of goodbyes. I hate it and I've never been good at it. But at least it forces you to live in the moment. ''This is maybe the last time that I see him, maybe the last time I walk along this street, last time I take this train.. Maybe the last time ever.'' It's pretty damn scary.
Also today started with goodbyes and every time I hope that these ones won't be the last ones. That I'll see those faces again. Maybe next year, maybe in ten years.
When I left from Finland I knew I'll come back and everything would be the same, more or less. But now when I'm gonna left France behind, it won't never be the same. We'll never be again there with all AFSers, it's gonna be a vacation, not a home. 

''Bye (bye), ich fühl mich so frei (frei)
Ich will nicht mehr heim.
Und mir is scheissegal was morgen kommt,
Ich heb mein Glas und schrei:
Bye (bye), ich fühl mich so frei (frei)
Ich will nicht mehr heim.
Und mir is scheissegal was morgen kommt,
Ich heb mein Glas und schrei....''

- Whatever, cro 

I've spend last days with Rike. She's one of those goodbyes which are hopefully not gonna be the last ones. We haven't maybe seen each others every day or even every month during this year, but there are always the people who become important for you, even after a little time. She's one of them. Other one is Mafe. She's gonna be unfortunately far away, but I'm sure that we're gonna find each other's again some day. So see you soon my girls? I love you both.